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We are stuck in an illusion: What’s the Point?*

In a recent nightmare everything is vanishing. I struggle to hold onto something, but the holding only increases the vanishing. 

Why is the society that seemed to support the goodness in ourselves seem to be vanishing? How is it our society is becoming more and more self-centered?

At the core of the problem seems to be fear but not the fear that protects the body but the fear that protects the ego, that which makes us separate from everything else. The beliefs of the Ego-Self are what we use to protect us from this fear and whether they are fact or fiction based they separate us from our fears as well as from each other and the environment around us.

Beliefs are necessary to maintain the illusion of separateness. Without them the separateness dissolves and we become all things. The defense of our beliefs is the defense of our ego, our illusion of separateness. Without them the illusion disappears and we disappear as a thing, an entity separate from all other entities. We will defend our beliefs to the death of all those who threaten them as well as our own death for without our beliefs, what are we but the everything, the whole, the All? And as All we cease to exist as does everything else.

Letting go of our illusions is a form of Kenosis, an act of “self-emptying”. I’m reminded of the story of Jacob’s Ladder in the Christian Bible where a ladder ascends from the earth-bound illusion to the heavens i.e. from the mundane of things to the everything/nothing of the divine.

My ego is terrified for it translates as oblivion as in becoming nothing i.e., no thing. What’s the point? 

It seems that our beliefs not only make us something but also give us a point for being.

This is not to say that one must be stuck in a belief for in a reality of infinite beliefs there’s a lot to experience and just maybe that’s the point.

*This article can also be found in The Book of Dreams blog

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Dark trees and shining moon

Plate 131 In Jung’s Red Book

In Jung’s Redbook on page 131 there’s a dark tree superimposed on a moonlike image that represents the joining of opposites, in this case the earth and the celestial realms, but also brings forth the feminine* and the unconscious aspects of the moon.

It also represents the flashes of insight that illuminate the hidden aspects of ourselves. The tree can represent the Self.

I see these trees everywhere against the full and partial moon as I take my nighttime walks that I use as a time of peacefulness, centeredness, and contemplation. I’m reminded of my own psychic journey as every one of these images synchronistically ** come into view. On this psychic journey, which Jung suggests that we are all on, I search my inner self for that which may bring psychological wholeness by looking for those sparks from the shadows of the unconscious.

An example of one of my shadow tree images

*Please note that I am not referring to biological gender when I use terms such as feminine or masculine. They are aspects that appear to represent generally ways of viewing reality, e.g., Compassion, inclusiveness, relatedness, intuitiveness, receptivity, nurturance, and linked to the unconscious as feminine aspects with assertiveness, action orientation, the conscious, and autonomy linked to the masculine. Each of us have both aspects with some groupings being more dominant than others.

** Acausal events that are seemingly coincidental (unlinked) that may mirror internal thoughts or feelings e.g., thinking of someone who then calls for the first time in a long time.

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When the Waking World and Sleeping World Dreams Converge

(Also posted 6-10-25 in The Book of Dreams blog)

Pedestrian tunnel that runs through the rock mountain in the Peñon de Ifach natural park in the city of Calpe, province of Alicante, Valencian Community, Spain.

[Because this is both a regular dream and also reflects dealing with a nightmare I’m posting it in both blogs.] 

Last night I found myself lost in caves and tunnels filled with salons, beauty shops a Buddhist Temple, and a bubbling brook used for meditation. I can’t find my way out. Everywhere I turn I’m lost. I’m frustrated in that every tunnel I go down takes me deeper into my lostness. It feels as though I’m starting to give up hope.

This is clearly an overwhelming and depressing dream. Because it’s an expression of what I’m experiencing in the waking world where chaos is everywhere and there seem to be few sane people left to turn to. Is there any way out of this nightmare? This dream is urging me to take some personal action, to transcend the tendency to retreat into myself.

The cave is my inner self, my deeper being. The tunnels are resources that I can use to get to where I want and need to be. The dream suggests that meditation and caring for my own well-being (Buddhist temple, babbling brook [calm down in order to see the way, the Tao], and salons) might help if not for the lostness, then for the calm needed to get through the craziness. The dream also suggests that I keep going and keep looking for an answer despite the frustration and helplessness.

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The winter of discontent

I’ve been dreaming a number of very dark and scary dreams over the past month. In one it’s a cold overcast day when a young toe-headed boy loses his head in a guillotine while in another dream several young women are in a cold-water cistern that is draining rapidly and they begin to circle the drain before going under.

The toe-headed boy may be my own innocence being decapitated as well as the morality and values of the country that are being thrown out as the people vote against their best interest for people who promise them something they’ll probably never give. 

The women circling the drain may represent compassion, caring, and inclusiveness dying all around me in a world gone mad with populism.

It has become a very dark world where the light of the candle is sputtering and the fire near the hearth barely crackles, leaving the room to grow cold.

Politically and socially, it is the ‘winter of our discontent.’ In Steinbeck’s novel of the same name a man seems willing to give up his morality to his desire for success through unethical means. Our world seems ready to do the same and is taking frightening form in my dreams.

May the new year bring less frightening dreams as well as less frightening events.

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Lost and panic creeps in

Nightmares will haunt you until you pay attention to them. And it’s not only about big traumas pushed into corners of the mind and praying they stay hidden. You can be suffering through some low grade stress and trauma that you’d just as soon ignore and are often able to shove into some corner of your everyday mind and it would stay there if it weren’t for nightmares. But the psyche doesn’t like to be ignored. It likes balance, it likes resolution.

When I ignore my everyday dreams on something that’s annoying me eventually I’ll be visted by a night time panic.

Lately the dark knight begins with me wandering out of some hotel conference into a city I don’t know and after a few twists and turns I find myself totally lost with no idea of which way to go to find my way back. Frequently it’s my car that I’m desperately trying to find or it’s the keys to said car. In either case the dream is suggesting a loss of independence, control, escape, or power.

That’s when the panic begins to swell within and confusion sets in. These are all symptoms of my sense of loss and control over my life and the direction that it’s taking. Lately it has been my sense of justice and what is right and honorable that’s being tested in a world that rewards lies and hate and glorifies ignorance. It’s become a world where violence wins out over love and chaos reigns supreme and its all showing up in my nightmarish dreams.

This kind of nightmare often comes to me more than once and will continue to do so until I deal with it. It is nudging me to pay attention to what is bothering me but not necessarily so that I can work to find a solution but to acknowledge what’s going on in me that I’m suppressing i.e., the first step out of denial toward resolution.

As with all dreams nightmares are there for a reason. They too are there for one’s health and well-being.

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“It’s not about you, Dad!”

After some time, when first hearing this from my daughter (see July 27th posting), it’s come to me that as an individuated soul, she’s right; it’s not about me; it’s about the soul. What I identify as me is just the vehicle. The ego-self (me) adds personalization where there may be none. Most of my upsets aren’t really about me, either. They belong to others trying to navigate their own lives. It’s about their ego interpretations and the daily events that they experience. 

This reflexive need to occasionally interpret the actions of others as being about me can get a bit old, and sometimes, it can get in the way of compassionately responding to others’ experiences and how they are dealing with them.

All too often, I create my waking dream experience in a nightmarish way when there’s little that relates to me directly. Unresolved experiences of earlier similar events in my life still get triggered as though they are current and have little to do with what’s going on with the other person I am relating to at the moment.

As with a sleeping dream, when I can step back to gain another perspective on the events in my waking dream, I can better interpret their meaning and deal with them more appropriately.

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Want to know what the Dark Knight looks like?

It was a dreary, overcast morning when I entered the local coffee shop down the street. It was Saturday, so the usual bustle of people going in and out of the shop was reduced to almost nothing. This was the end of a long and painful walk I had taken that morning, having gotten up before the sun to take advantage of the early morning coolness.

“How are you doing today?” the barista asked as I ordered my coffee. 

My mind was just finishing up with a poor-me-diatribe born of a bruised ego conversation I’d had with one of my daughters earlier in the week. What I wanted to say was…

“As my daughter keeps saying, any time there’s an upset, “This isn’t about you, Dad!” Never mind that I have feelings and thoughts; they’re irrelevant to what’s going on. But she’s probably right. I don’t feel very relevant these days, and wonder if I never was, but my ego was too busy to notice. 

Another side to my irrelevant self says, “So what?” Who’s to care if it’s not about me?

I want to think I’ve lived my life with at least giving and taking in equal measure, if not a little more to the giving side. Still, I’m not the determiner of that because the ego nearly always tries to weigh its experience toward the self-interest positive end of the spectrum. 

Others in the family will write the story of my life that will be handed down, and from what I hear, I’ve failed miserably to live up to their expectations. It also seems a universal opinion that I failed and made it too much about me. But so what? I can’t change it now; soon, my ego will be dead, and how relevant I was won’t make any difference; the damage was done. I’m also not sure that the soul cares one way or the other, either. 

It’s starting to feel like I’ve wasted my once-only time here. But again, that’s the ego talking, and the soul doesn’t care; the ego did its job by giving the soul a vehicle for entering the world.”

But all I said was, “Fine, just fine. How’s yours been going?” And then I thanked him for my coffee and said, “Have a good one!” as my ‘irrelevant self’ walked out the door. It was no use wasting a perfectly good ‘poor me’ and spreading my “down-eristic” self on an innocent barista. 

I have had these Dark Night experiences many times throughout my life. For many years, I used to run from them, which only got me mired and stuck, but now I periodically embrace them as a means of transcending them and moving through into the light.

“How’s your day going so far?”

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Fear in dreams

In the last two postings of the Book of Dreams Blog*, I’ve examined fear and anger in dreams and in our waking lives. Today’s Dark Knight of the Soul post extends these themes.

The dream (a mild nightmare): A woman is crawling on the ground in obvious distress. In the dream, several different females are in distress.

Interpretation: is this an attack on the soul? Soul stress? On the individuated soul/anima Mundi?

There is a general dysphoria that has gripped the societies of the world. Though this nightmare-like dream may be idiopathic, i.e., not caused by a specific trauma, it may reflect a more global and profound trauma being experienced daily. We are awash in fear-generated news almost 24/7, placing us in nearly constant fight/flight/freeze mode. This affects society’s cohesion, creating an atmosphere of everyone for themselves type of action. Not realizing this fear is internal, we seek ways to mitigate the feelings by attaching ourselves to like-minded people and blaming others outside ourselves and the group we’ve attached to. 

Not knowing where these feelings of fear come from, we conjure wild conspiracy scenarios to create an object of our fears that we can then attack or defend against. But it is us who are the enemy. Wherever we run, wherever we turn, there we are. We flail at ghosts and that which is not us. We try to mitigate what threatens us but always miss the actual perpetrator. Meanwhile, the soul is hung out to dry with its purpose and value-driven existence, drowning in fear and draining its energy as it thrashes about.

*see https://thebookofdreamsblog.wordpress.com/2024/07/21/fear-and-anger-two-sides-of-the-manipulation-coin/

And

Fear and Anger Part II
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“Throw a line into the darkness”

The Nightmare by-Henry Fuseli

The other day while watching a rather intriguing detective series on PBS titled Anika I became aware of the background music and its rather haunting lyrics. The theme song “Bringing Murder to the Land” by Newcome and Allison spoke to me in another way than perhaps it was intended as a theme song for a murder drama.

“Throw a line into the darkness

Oh, we are shadows, blaze inside

This light will shine unbroken tonight

Shine inside

And this light, it can blind us

Torch the shadows for all time

And you can color in my dark nights

Paint your promise over me

This light will shine unbroken tonight

Shine inside

Shine tonight

Shine tonight

Shine tonight

Burn

Burn

Burn

Burn

Burn”

The first line, “Throw a line into the darkness,” reminds me of what the mind is doing through a nightmare. It’s also reminiscent of “fishing,” a metaphor for bringing up something from the spiritual and the deep so that one can deal with it in the light. While trying to bring this darkness into the light of consciousness, “Oh, we are shadows, blaze inside. This light will shine unbroken tonight; shine inside. And this light, it can blind us, torch the shadows for all time” these lines suggest to me that we can be overwhelmed and blinded by the darkness of our shadow self as it grows in brightness, entering our awareness. Bringing the dark into the light can add color to our darker natures, and by looking more closely at the nightmare, it can hold much promise for bringing light into our future nights and “burn” away our fears.

Perhaps it was the mysterious and haunting way the music was sung and the slight reverb in its presentation that wormed its way into my soul, or maybe it was the cryptic lyrics. Still, it struck me as the perfect theme for the nightmare dreaming and interpreting genre.

Murder in a dream can conjure the need for change or the effects change can have on one’s status quo. It can also be about ending some vexing issues, habits, or behavior.

Bright lights can symbolize spiritual awakening from the darkness of the ego coming through the hidden aspects of the unconscious, which can be quite shocking at first when one sees a different reality than the one they have been living.

The ‘’burn, burn, burn…” in a dream can be about something that you can’t just ignore. This may be true of any occasional nightmare. If one is human, There is repressed material in the unconscious mind that can affect everything done in the conscious world. Nightmares bring light to that hidden material, especially when it causes problems that must be addressed.

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Morpheus Speaks: The Encyclopedia of Dream Interpreting

Over 5000 dream descriptors with everyday dream images and image interpretations of the Zodiac and Tarot that show up in dreams. The book also includes a section on nightmares and current research and treatment for excessive nightmare dreams.

Learn the possible meanings of snakes, witches, and death in your dreams, kittens, wise old men/women, or angels. What might it mean if you’re being chased or shot at, drowning or trying to find a bathroom, or just standing out in the open naked?

There’s also a section on how to remember your dreams.

See the ordering picture link on the right-side column.